This source came from the Wise Traditions in Food, Farming, and The Healing Arts, it is a quarterly magazine published by Weston A. Price Foundation. Linda Forristal CCP, MTA is a former Board Member of Weston A. Price Foundation. The Weston A. Price Foundation is a non-profit charity to support the on going research of whole foods and nutrition. This was one of the first articles I discovered it has been beneficial in leading me to other research data and articles. My choice to use this source was based on the fact it provides some diversity for my sources. The writer included a short detail on consumption, enzymes used to make the HFCS, how these enzymes make it unnatural, what products it is used in, and information on a research project that was conducted. It also included how the need for this product came at a good time for the corn industry. I found that this source gave me information in the beginning to think about and research more in depth. This source is similar to other sources in the information it pertains to. However, article was written in a short to the point fashion without a lot of technical detail like most of my other sources.
I found the information in chapter 14 building complex sentence very helpful in rewriting my sentences I paid attention to its suggestions and made some minor changes to a couple of sentences. I chapter 15 breaking up strings of compound sentences, and varying sentence openings were very helpful. For this paragraph I did not find a lot of changes to be made based on breaking up strings of compound sentences but did find that I use the same opening a lot in this paragraph so I looked it over and made the necessary changes.
This source came from the Wise Traditions in Food, Farming, and The Healing Arts, it is a quarterly magazine published by Weston A. Price Foundation. Linda Forristal CCP, MTA is a former Board Member of Weston A. Price Foundation. The Weston A. Price Foundation is a non-profit charity to support the on going research of whole foods and nutrition. This was one of the first articles I discovered it has been beneficial in leading me to other research data and articles. My choice to use this source was based on the fact it provides some diversity for my sources. The writer included a short detail on consumption, enzymes used to make the HFCS, how these enzymes make it unnatural, what products it is used in, and information on a research project that was conducted. It also included how the need for this product came at a good time for the corn industry. I found that this source gave me information in the beginning to think about and research more in depth. This source is similar to other sources in the information it pertains to. However, article was written in a short to the point fashion without a lot of technical detail like most of my other sources.
I found the information in chapter 14 building complex sentence very helpful in rewriting my sentences I paid attention to its suggestions and made some minor changes to a couple of sentences. I chapter 15 breaking up strings of compound sentences, and varying sentence openings were very helpful. For this paragraph I did not find a lot of changes to be made based on breaking up strings of compound sentences but did find that I use the same opening a lot in this paragraph so I looked it over and made the necessary changes.
1 response so far ↓
1 Sarah // Mar 24, 2007 at 5:54 pm
The revised paragraph seems to flow smoother than the original. You may want to take out “it is” for the first sentence, using the comma to pause the thought then jump back into when the magazine is published. It seems like this grammar assignment has honed your writing skill, good job!
Leave a Comment